Monday, 20 December 2010

Oh No, She's Here

One busy morning, Mother Novelist came floating down out of the ether, and said, “How’s the novel going?  Because if you’re writing gibberish, you’ll be in a lot of trouble.”

So I said, “I’ve written about sixty pages now of Working Title: Afterwards.  I’ve been a good little writer.”

And Mother Novelist said, “Well okay then.  Keep at it.”  And off she floated.

And I looked at the computer.  Yup, sixty pages of the same thing happening over and over.  Wander around some woods, get attacked, escape, wander around…  What am I doing?  The next twenty pages I’ve already written, but I’ve yet to re-read it.  And then what?  WHAT?  Tell me.

I don’t know.  I’m writing a novel and I have no idea what I’m doing with it.  The last sixty pages are probably a complete mess.  For a start, the seasons change randomly.

How can I possibly write a story and not know where it is going?

Everything else has had some simple thread at the heart of it. 

Working Title: The Road To Confidence: Hannah learns to be a con artist. 

Working Title: Rigor Morris: the medium attempts to cure the mortician of being undead. 

Working Title: The Unadulteress: Bertie gets together with/breaks up with her husband. 

Working Title: The Shovel, PI: The Shovel solves a crime. 

Working Title: Evelynland: Evelyn, uh, hangs around with the bad guy for a bit; aha, see no thread, no wonder I struggle with it. 

Working Title: Donald Benton: Superdork: er, Donald, um, is a loser; again no aim, no wonder I’ve no idea how to end it.

But this one’s the worst yet.  I can’t keep writing it until I come up WITH A PLOT.  But I don’t know what the plot should be so instead I keep writing it.  I don’t even feel that this is the project I want to be working on.  It feels like a place holder until I figure out what I do want to do.

What do I want to do?

When I log on to blogspot/blogger whatever it’s called, first I check the blogs I follow for updates, then I post my thoughts, and then I click the magical ‘next blog’ button to discover some fascinating tale from someone anywhere in the world.

I’m faintly disturbed by how many families have blogs and post up pictures of their kids.  Haven’t they seen Red Dragon or One Hour Photo?  But today I seem to have somehow slipped into homemade jewellery hell.  Click after click after click, all homemade jewellery blogs.  I must have gone through twenty.  Have I slipped into a loop?  How did I get in the loop?  Why is there no way out?  Okay the same blogs are now coming round again.  Fine.  Have it your way.  Forget other people’s stories; I don’t want to hear them.  No more blogging for me today.

What do I want to do?

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